You need to see how easily, lawyers make complaints. We complain about the organs and institutions of government. We complain about our clients, we complain about the police (regular customers) and complain about fellow colleagues. Of course, one favorite complaint target of the gentlemen and (excuse me, ladies) of the wig and gown profession is the Court.
All the departments of Judicial institution are fat targets for our arrows of criticism and complaints. As far as we are concerned, the Registry is staffed with sloths, while the Probate is perpetually moribund; we almost never have any words of praise for the ‘mechanics’ of the bailiff section, and our relationship with court registrars is always at a love-hate frequency.
Naturally, the monarchs of the judicial glade, the nobles of adjudication and the chief priests in the shrines and temples of justice, (popularly known and beknown and “milords an miladies”) never escape the barbs, even bites of our complaints.
It is either they are slow, ignorant, compromised, hostile, proud, unserious, overbearing and even sometimes outrightly stupid when we are at our acerbic worst. The good judge in our estimate is rare, the excellent judge has not been born, while the perfect judge cannot be conceived!
Alas, our complaints, as numerous and diverse, rarely yield fruits of correction. Thus our criticisms, complaints and grumblings amount to nothing but the braying of asses!
Ask me why? And I will tell you one good reason why this is so. Once upon a time, just about two weeks ago, the Secretary General of the N.B.A Ikeja was accosted by a member of his branch, in the grounds of the Ikeja High Court. The member is Barrister Salau, a senior member of the profession.
Knowing that the Ikeja Bar would soon be having elections and that the General Secretary is running for a higher office in the said elections, Barrister Salau in a most passionate manner, counseled the Bar politician on the need for the Bar leadership to see to it that the needless hassles and inefficiency that attend the administration of justice in the courts, particularly the execution of judgement are tackled expeditiously and successfully.
Then about seven days later, Mr. General Secretary ran into Barrister Salau in the same premises of the Ikeja High Court. Salau was looking agitated, flustered, bewildered and in a recoiling state of bemusement.
Naturally the G.S was curious to know the cause of his friend’s agony. Salau went straight to the point – he was stunned to hear a High Court Judge (Okikiolu-Ighile.J) declining to read a judgement in open court, because of power outage but directed counsel to parties to apply to the registrar of court for certified true copies of the (unread) judgement!
Surely that was anomalous. The following conversation now took place between the G.S and B.S (Barrister Salau):
G.S – Ha, Ha, how can that be?
B.S – Oh yes, it happened. I just left that Court now.
G.S – What is the name of the case, so that the Bar can take up the matter with the judge.
B.S – Oh, I will give you the name later.
G.S – (rather surprised) Why later? Why not now? I mean it’s just a matter of us(Bar leadership) meeting the judge over it. It’s nothing hard.
B.S – (clearly discomfited) Well, it is this case…
Gentlemen and ladies of the Bar, talk is cheap. We not only talk but walk the talk.
N.B – I hope this write up will not irk B.S so much as to cost me his vote.
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